What I wasn't told!

After I got married, I was constantly asked the age old question, "when are you going to have a baby?".

I often answered as vaguely as possible, "whenever God blesses me with a child, that's when!"

The truth was I knew I wanted to wait a bit, not too long, but long enough to settle in to the role of wife. I also feared that if I boasted a time frame of when I would conceive, I just might jinx myself out of that miraculous gift I so craved.

When I finally did see those two pink stripes on the little white stick, I jumped for joy and called everyone that night! One of the things I remember most vividly throughout my pregnancy was hearing all the great advice from veteran moms. "Sleep when the baby sleeps." "Breastfeed. You will lose weight faster." "Use a paci if you need too." "Stay in the hospital as long as you need too." "Eat whatever you want, but not too much." "You can drink wine!" "Stay home as long as you can if you can." "Let people bring you meals." "Enjoy every moment because it goes by so fast." "Take a million pictures." "Listen to your mommy instincts." "Take care of yourself." "You're going to be the best mom ever." "Don't forget about your husband." There are probably many more that I was told, but these are the ones I remember the most.

This advice was great and I try to hold onto it whenever possible. The tough part is what no one told me.

My loved ones failed to mention to me how utterly and completely exhausted I would be... ALL THE TIME. No one told me how hard, challenging, difficult, and HARD motherhood is. No one told me how I would be constantly filled to the brim with worry and guilt over even the smallest things. When I talk to other moms about this, they either tell me, "Its okay, it's totally normal" or "Yeah, no one told me either."

So there... I told you.